update 6.26.10

so today I've had:
yogurt: 90 cals.
small slice of pizza: ??
Even without knowing the cals. of the pizza, I still feel pretty good about today. And I didn't plan on eating the pizza, but you know how things go.
But i don't plan on eating much else :)

Today is feeling pretty good. Hopefully I can keep things going in Cali.

xoxo

california, here i come.

So to add on to the no-posting, I'm going to California bright and early tomorrow morning. I'll be there for about a week, maybe more. Let's hope not more. It'll be easy not eating there though because I have real life reverse thinspo. (my cousin is quite a cow) And my grandmother has a pool and I need to look fabulous in a bikini. Not for my grandmother, of course, but for me. I realized that I don't want to look good to impress anyone, or prove anything to anyone. Or to even look good for anyone. I want to look good standing in front of the mirror. In front of myself. I want to feel confident every single time I walk out the door. Every time I see a reflection. I don't want confidence only sometimes, but every single day. And I need to prove to myself that I can do it. I don't care what others think. Well, that's a lie, but I care more about what I think.

Anyways, I got way off topic. I'm going away for a week or more and I won't be able to post at all :( I'm very sad to say goodbye to the blog and to all you beatiful people, but I have to.
This time away should do me some good and I'll come back stronger than ever.
Don't go anywhere, babydolls<3
Stay strong while I'm gone. I'll reply to any emails before I leave and maybe while I'm there. If I'm lucky, I'll get in a post or two over the week, but there are no garuntees. I love you!

xoxo

Hey guys

Still no test results :( I need money!! I saw a pregnancy test yesterday for $40! Ugh. And on top of that, I've been with my boyfriend like all day everyday. Which isn't too bad, but a girl needs to restrict once in a while! We went out for dinner last night and it was some fancy shmancy place. And it was free. So I couldn't just be like, no thanks. And there was three courses! What has the world come too? A fatass, that's what. But I'm fasting as best as I can today. But I can't make this post too long. I'm in my boyfriends bathroom with his phone. And he might get suspicious and wake up. But wish me luck girlies. I need it more than you know.

xoxo

Blehhh

I feel so out of the loop.
Sorry I ran away from the blog without much explanation.
I've had little to no access to the Internet on my own time and I have to sneak onto my boyfriends computer to get in a post every now and then. I still have like no access so this will be one of the very few posts I'll have on a while. I've been doing good on my own though.
Tell me, how is everyone doing?
I haven't had any time to read updates /:
I'm sorry dears!
Everything will be back to normal soon.
Stay strong!
And don't leave me! ;)
love you, babydolls.
Email me <3

xoxo

I won't be posting for a while.
Sorry guys!
Love you!
xoxo