Re-Introduction

So I abandoned this blog completely in 2013, when I was 18 years old, but wasn't really active at that time either. I'm sure no one else here is active anymore or remembers my blog, but I'm starting new (again) and feel it's appropriate to re introduce myself since much has changed in the last 3-4 years. 

My name's Morgan, I'm 21 years old, going to be 22 in less than a month. I live in Las Vegas, and I have EDNOS. If you're not familiar with that, it's an "Eating Disorder Not Otherwise Specified" basically meaning that I fall neither here nor there on any specific eating disorder. To put it simply, I have a really bad relationship with food and weight loss. 

Since the last time I really updated, a lot has changed, obviously. I've graduated high school, I've been working at my current job for the last 3 years, I moved out of my parent's home, and I've come out as gay and genderfluid. I'm still struggling with the same eating problems though, but over the last few years I have gained A LOT of weight. When I was running this blog I was around 130 pounds, the last time I actually weighed myself, which was a few months ago, I was 170. I'm sure I weigh even more than that now, because I've been binging a hell of a lot more than restricting, but that's why I've come back to this blog. Updating here always kept me more in check so even if I'm writing to no one at all, I'll be here (hopefully) regularly. I'm not sure what my diet plan is going to be yet, but I'll make another post when I figure it out. My ultimate goal weight for now is 115 pounds. Wish me luck on my new journey (again)

Hello 2013

I know I'm a little late on resolutions, but better late than never. I was thinking about getting some diet pills to reduce my appetite because I have a tendency to eat when I'm bored. I was thinking Pure Green Coffee Bean pills but I haven't done much research on them yet. If anyone knows any weight loss pills that you've tried or you know that work, please let me know! xox

I haven't posted on this for over a year now but it looks like some blogs I follow are still active. but i'm thinking about moving to tumblr. if any of you are still active, and have a tumblr please comment on this post or something! thanks xox

no eating allowed

so since I get yelled at for everytime I eat, I'm just gonna stop eating at home. but then they notice when I don't eat, and get all concerned. WTF! make up your god damn mind. but I don't fucking care what they say to me, or about me. I'm fucking done. I'm not staying home anymore and if I am home, I'm staying in my room. maybe then they'll feel bad for the things they say. maybe then they'll miss me. I can honestly say I hate where I live.

In other news, I'm finally talking to my long lost father. I've never met him, or my older sister and now I'm talking to them on facebook. He wants me to go to Idaho with them for thanksgiving. ah. thanksgiving. the worst holiday. my close family is used to me not eating. But I can't just refuse food at a strangers thanksgiving. And I don't know if I'm ready to meet that side of the family yet. I'd feel so uncomfortable and out of place.

But I haven't decided what I want to do yet.
wish me luck.
xoxo

xxxxxxx

so I gained like 3629619 pounds over this weekend >.<
grandmothers house.
Halloween.
'nuff said.